Emor: Disabilities, Ugliness, and True Leadership

The priestly regulations in Emor are very difficult to read
Marrying a divorcee seen as a blemish
No Physical blemishes or disabilities
Cohanim can’t get defiled by dead, leading to cohanim not attending funerals, or having portable mechitzas, or even the guy who flew in a plastic bag (which was over the op)
It’s a very difficult parsha for those of us who want such people to have equal access
Why shouldn’t someone who is lame be able to be a cohen?
Are they really a bad representative? Are we worried they’re not photogenic?
And the truth is, we tend to choose leaders on disturbingly superficial grounds
Are they tall? Are they handsome?
Mike Dukakis visited my high school, surprised how short he was
I have seen the claim: shorter candidate only won presidential elections 3 times in last century
George Bush won, but not the popular vote
I am disturbed by this, and I hope you share my feelings.
I would like us to pick leaders on more substantive grounds.
On disability issue, talmud shifts ground:
(Megillah 29a) Rav Ashi deduced from Leviticus 21:20 that arrogance constitutes a blemish; such an imperfection would prevent a Cohen from performing the offerings.
Chagigah 5a teaches: “Over these does G-d weep daily: over the one who is able to study the Torah and does not; over the one who is unable to devote the time to Torah and study it; and over the public leader who is arrogant in his leadership”.
Perfection in leadership for the Talmud is not about looking handsome, having a nice smile, or being tall or convincing. It’s about humility—humility to know your followers have wisdom and need to be heard, and honoring and empowering others; humility to let others speak their mind even if they disagree; humility to know you have your own faults, your own blemishes, and are striving to correct them just like anyone else, and being willing to admit your own character faults, and that you don’t know everything, and shows others by example what it is to be on a constant path of improvement.
Ta’anit 20a-b: completely deconstructs the biblical model of perfection
The bible: seems to say: beauty is physical perfection, with a nice virgin wife on your arm
The following passage questions who is truly beautiful, who is truly ugly

Once Rabbi Elazar son of R. Shimon was coming from Migdal Gedor, from the house of his teacher. He rode along the riverside on his donkey, and was feeling happy and elated because he had studied much Torah.
There chanced to meet him an exceedingly ugly man, who greeted him, "Peace be upon you, my master!" R. Elazar did not return his salutation but instead said to him, "How ugly this person is! Are all the people of your city as ugly as you?"
"I do not know," said the man. "But go to the craftsman who made me, and say to him: How ugly is the vessel which you have made!"
Realizing that he had done wrong, R. Elazar dismounted from his donkey, prostrated himself before the man, and said to him, "You are right. Forgive me!" But the man replied, "I will not forgive you until you go to the craftsman who made me and say to him, 'How ugly is the vessel which you have made.'"
R. Elazar kept on walking after him until he reached his city. The residents of the city came out to greet him, saying, "Peace be upon you, O Teacher! O Master!" Said the man to them, "Whom are you calling 'Master'?" Said they, "The person walking behind you."
Said he to them: "If this is a 'Master,' may there not be any more like him in Israel."
"Why?" asked the people.
Said the man: Such-and-such he has done to me.
"Nevertheless, forgive him," said they, "for he is a man greatly learned in the Torah."
"For your sakes I will forgive him," said the man, "but only if he does not act this way anymore."
Soon after this R. Elazar entered the study hall and taught: "A person should always be pliant as the reed, and let him never be hard as the cedar. And for this reason the reed merited that of it should be made a pen for the writing of the Torah, tefillin and mezuzot."
The ugly man, who was objectively physically ugly—the Talmud says so—wasn’t really the ugly man. I’m nbot sure he was so nice—he wasn’t all that forgiving. But the ugliness—exceeding ugliness-was merely superficial.
Reb Elazar was really ugly. He was arrogant with his learning-- He was so proud of how many daf genorah he had studied. But he was obnoxious, he wasn’t a nice guy.
That, the Talmud is saying, is true ugliness, is the true blemish.
May we all have the humility to honor others, to make space for others opinions, and to see the true beauty within each other.